Review

How comforting is it to accept that we don’t have to get along with everyone? It’s a thought that has always unsettled us. Even when we want to believe that it’s okay not to connect with everyone, a part of us still longs to be understood, liked, and accepted. And this book gently challenges that very notion reminding us that peace does not always come from fitting in, but from choosing what feels true for our heart.

“It’s time to embrace the mindset of a relationship minimalist – someone who chooses depth over breadth, clarity over clutter.”

Right from the title, I knew this book had something important to say. It’s Okay Not to Get Along with Everyone is a gentle yet powerful reminder that boundaries are not selfish, they are necessary. Through simple words and thoughtful illustrations, Dancing Snail encourages us to choose ourselves, our peace, and our well-being, even when it comes to the people we love the most. Because sometimes, love is not enough.

Also Read: Book Review: Bhima’s Wife by Kavita Kane – Hidimbi’s Untold Story.

This book speaks about the quiet magic that happens when we step back from constantly adjusting for others, and begin prioritizing our inner world. It reminds us that protecting our emotional space is just as important as caring for relationships. In a world that often glorifies over-giving, this book feels like permission to pause, breathe, and come back home to yourself.

Divided into three parts, it explores relationships with nuance and compassion.

The first section, “Not Too Close, Not Too Far,” explores the delicate balance relationships require. Sometimes love ends for small reasons, and other times we keep compromising endlessly just to hold on. It talks about constant adjusting to save bonds, and gently reminds us that some “not-okay” moments shouldn’t be ignored. Sometimes, letting go even when love exists is an act of self-respect.

The second part, “It’s Okay Not to Get Along with Everyone,” focuses on forgiveness, memory, and peace. It acknowledges that while we may forgive, we don’t always forget and that’s okay. It’s okay to choose peace over people-pleasing. Choosing peace over approval is a form of courage. You don’t have to be liked by everyone to be enough.

The third section, “People Need People,” explores the delicate art of connection, what it means to let someone enter your heart, why excitement alone isn’t enough, and how empathy can sometimes feel heavy. It speaks about friendship, love, letting go, heartbreak, and the quiet acceptance of paths not meant to cross. It beautifully captures how relationships need trust, respect, and safety.

The writing style is simple, natural, conversational, and deeply comforting. It gently points out how often we blur boundaries in the name of love. The illustrations add warmth, while the tone feels calm, like a friend gently reminding you of what you already know deep down.

I especially loved the small metaphors the author uses, like:

“You are like a hairpin, never around when I need you.”

Such moments make you pause and reflect on one-sided relationships, where we are always present for others, but they aren’t there for us in return. It quietly asks you: are you holding on out of love, or out of habit? The book speaks of love, friendship, heartbreak, letting go, and healing in a soothing tone that stays with you. It also reminds us that love alone is not enough, respect and trust matter just as much. At its heart, this book talks about the emotional weight of constantly trying to fit into spaces that drain us. It gently encourages us to stop apologising for outgrowing people, for needing distance, for choosing silence over stress.

One line that especially stayed with me was:

“When things don’t go the way your heart wants, maybe it’s time to follow where the heart can go.”

It reminds us that stepping back, resting, and allowing ourselves time to feel safe again is part of healing and part of opening our hearts to relationships that truly choose us. The idea of a “heart locker”, closing it gently, reflecting, healing, and opening it again only for those who choose you is deeply moving.

This is a powerful, soothing book, one to return to whenever you feel overwhelmed, hurt, or when your boundaries are being crossed. It’s a must-read, must-keep, and a gentle reminder to always choose yourself. Not every bond is meant to be carried forever, and not every distance is a loss, sometimes, it is freedom.   Choosing yourself is not a betrayal. It is survival. It is self-love. A gentle, comforting guide to protecting your peace.

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